wasp sting chronicles

On Monday I got stung by a wasp. The last time I got stung by a wasp was 12 years ago, and I got frost bite.
Maybe that needs a little explaining.
I didn't get frost bite FROM the wasp sting per say. Although, that would be pretty amazing. A wasp that gave you frost bite.
It wasn't that cool though.
I got stung three or four times by the same wasp, in the same spot. It swelled, and I was given an ice pack which, in turn, froze my arm.
Apparently I was hysterical.
About the sting. Not the frost bite.
I don't doubt that's true.
I was terrified by wasps when I was a kid.
And fair enough.
I've been stung more times than the average person.


(1). Age 5 (?). while having a tea party with my friend Sarah in our front yard. The honey got swarmed. I got stung. I thought it was pretty cool. My cousins were coming two days later and I wanted to show it off. It, of course, had disappeared by the time they showed up.

(2). Age 6(?). with the same friend but this time in her front yard. Playing on the slip 'n' slide (Remember those? Unending summer entertainment.). Stepped on a bee while running through the clover for what (I'm sure) would have been en epic slide which was trumped by the stinger in my foot.

(3). Age 7 (?). While asleep in our new house. The ceiling was unfinished and there had been a yellow jacket up where the ceiling tiles ended (right above my head). It must have been asleep or just completely dazed because it fell from the ceiling, hit me in the face, I rolled on it and it stung me on the neck. It was awesome.

(4). Age 9. Grade four camping trip. Running around at Catherine Lake, a wasp flew down my black sparkley bathing suit and stung me on the butt. I was in French immersion at the time and one of our French teachers, who used to sing a song that went something along the lines of "OPEN THE CAN OF BEEEEAAAANNNSS OH YEAH OPEN THE CAN OF BEEEEEEEEAAANNNNS OH YEAH. AND A TIP AND A TOP AND A TIP OF KETCHUP. AND A TIP AND A TOP AND A TIP OF KETCHUP. OUVRE LES FEVES AU LARD OOOOOOOOH YEAH. OUVRE LES FEVES AU LARD OOOOOOOOH YEAH. ET UN TIP ET UN TOP EH UN TIP AU KETCHUP. ET UN TIP EH UN TOP EH UN TIP AU KETCHUP...", had to strip me down and apply bug bite cream to my ass. Luckily my mum was there. Otherwise it could have been questionable.

(5) & (6). Age 9 (again). Camping (again). This time in the interior with my parents at a beach called Rag Beach. My brother and I were searching for my parents and happened to walk through a wasps nest. I got stung on the face and leg. Quinn got stung somewhere. My mum got stung on the leg after hearing us scream and running to find us. My cheek swelled up to the size of a baseball. It was so cool.

(7). Age 12. The frost bite incident.

(8). Age 24. Walking out my front door. Wasp hit my wrist. Guessing it got stuck in my bangles. Freaked out. Stung my wrist. I missed my bus. And my ferry. Fuck fashion.

(my brother once, at the age of two, was running on the beach naked and got stung on his penis. I was not unlucky enough to have this happen. Partly because I don't have a penis, but also because I've never been one to run around naked.)

Back to the frost bite though.
It's the weirdest sensation to realise that a piece of your arm is actually frozen.

I showed my teacher. His face went white. He told me to take the ice pack off. Part of me wanted to leave it on and see what would happen. I didn't.

Nobody else believed me. I had my best friend's nanna (reluctantly) take me to the doctor after the day was over. I ended up with a rookie doctor who said it was just an allergic reaction and a big "I told you so" from nanna. My mum also took me to the doctor the next day (MY doctor) who said "I don't know who you saw before, but this is CLEARLY first degree frost bite.".

I had a bandage on my arm for a week. If you look close enough, my arm is still slightly purple.

Nothing cool happened this time around. No frost bite. No swollen cheek. My arm did swell up quite a bit and it is still sore. It's amazing how much damage such a little insect can do to you.



As a kid, whenever I got stung, I waited for an allergic reaction to kick in. I always expected that I was going to be hauled off in an ambulance, die, and then have my wake in my best friend's living room like Macaulay Culkin in My Girl. That, of course, never happened. I am, obviously, still alive and have not yet had a severe allergic reaction to a wasp or bee sting.

Although, every time I do get stung, it gets a little worse and that is a little concerning. This time around, my arm was swollen for two days and sore for three. It's still a little itchy.
It's something I guess I should probably keep an eye on. I should probably (according to my mother) buy some benadryl.
Maybe even an epi pen?
Although, to be honest, I'd almost rather die of a bee sting than stab myself in the leg.